A dream is conceptually identical to a performance in the Silencio Club in that every scene is pre-recorded, a reassembly of actual events. This composite rich of emotions feels no less real or intense, inviting the dreamer on a journey of self-exploration. When the dreamer acquired the knowledge of her identity, the dream has to end — the overwhelmed singer has to tragically drop to the ground, and the dreamer has to jerk awake, twitching in a way we can’t tell if she’s suffering from a near-death anxiety, an orgasm from the loving sort of love, or frustration from masturbation that is more akin to self-harm. The transition from dream to reality (a place where daydream and fantasy can still occur) is brutal precisely because of how sacred and harmonious the dream is. Despite Hollywood conspiracies and a few comical bursts of violence lurking in the background, Diane’s dreams all came true in the dream where Betty is the lead actress. In a way, Diane achieved peak performance by playing Betty and Rita perfectly. I (and who I watched the film with) wonder if in her deep subconscious, it is more important to be with Camilla than to achieve career success. But both desire for love and career tap into the exploration of identity. Betty seems to have already found her identity as the next best Hollywood actress right from the beginning, but it is only when she started assisting Rita to find her identity did she truly become herself. The discovery of Rita’s identity becomes the exploration of who Diane is — an unidentifiable corpse. In reality, Diane is indeed a living corpse, and in the end she appears to have taken her own life. Hence, Rita’s shock and breakdown when seeing the corpse is Diane’s inability to accept that her life is over in multiple aspects. When Rita found harmony and peace in Betty’s arms, really it is Diane imagining and desiring to become Camilla while at the same time wanting to be embraced by Camilla. Her ultimate dream is to achieve oneness with the love of her life, the Hollywood ideal. This is why Betty even gave in when the audition became a bit too intimate, utilizing the opportunity to its fullest, changing her strategy and quickly shredding off her initial identity as the naive young actress. If the dream continues, it may grow more similar to reality, losing its sacredness gradually, so waking up is an act of leaving the the dream place where dreams only come true if you don’t know who you are, and returning to the place where you get alienated from or lost your identity in the first place. Life is just a waking dream.
Life is a waking dream.
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