S3E8的开头,Joe对Love读出了《More than two》这本书里的一段话: "Happily ever after is a myth, because people are not static. Our partners do not owe us a guarantee that they will never change." 从第一季的文艺变态书店老板,到这一季如Love口中总是distracted的出轨老公,Joe变了吗?不得不说这一集里面,编剧对Joe Goldberg这个人物的挖掘更深了。他可能变了,也可能没有变。就像小时候的Joe对收养机构里唯一关心他却又被男友家暴的Nurse Fiona说的那样——There are a lot of bad men out there, and sometimes you can't tell until it's too late. Joe就是这样的bad man。

Joe每次的犯罪都可以说是因为爱,可是他真的懂爱吗?从Beck到Love再到Marienne,他沉迷于某种被他称之为"YOU"的pattern,沉迷于英雄救美的故事,沉迷于他自己对于relationship充满control的样子,甚至是他对于Henry的爱,会不会或多或少是把自己童年的影子投射在Henry身上了呢?不敢否定Joe真的爱过他人,也不敢妄下定论Joe一定只爱自己,但至少Joe的爱是自私的。这部剧里的另外几个角色也是自私的,Theo就是打着真爱旗帜破坏别人家庭的selfish teenage asshole(可能因为年轻,就真爱至上吧),Ryan更是无恶不作、把前任视为自己所有物肆意践踏折磨的自私猥琐普信男(实在想不出有什么词可以骂他了)。第一集就领便当的Natalie就更不用说了,即使她只是想给自认为无聊的婚姻找点乐子,但对比她丈夫在她死后疯狂的想要找出杀人凶手、喝得烂醉翻看着他们俩的结婚相册怀念着她的样子,真的觉得她在婚姻中更关心自我感受。只是Joe伪装得更好。浪漫体贴文艺男青年的人设真的很难被拒绝吧。但是又如第一季里面Beck书里写的那样,But the stories were in you, deep as poison. Joe何尝不是自己在为自己编写这些故事呢?Deep as poison.

最后一集Joe用Love的口吻伪造的suicide letter (or confession letter) 在我看来是可以把这一季的故事拉到第一季高度的。第一季里讲了一个女孩子和童话的故事,最后女孩子发现prince charming和bluebeard是同一个人。而这一季的信,依然很女权,即使是在加州最安全的社区你也不一定会觉得安全,因为你是女性,因为你是个妈妈。话说回来,Love一定是YOU这个系列里最特别的女性角色了。很多评论都觉得Joe和Love是绝配。有些夫妻,就是会不断把彼此最坏的一面带出来。可能这也算是一种相配吧。对比本季一开始出场的超级讨人厌Sherry和Cary夫妇,这实在太讽刺了。被关在笼子里的Sherry和Cary在Love和Joe看来是奇怪的,因为在那种情况下他俩还能bring out the best of each other。即使在Love的挑唆下Sherry 和Cary也会有争吵会互相指责,但他们最后还是活着出来了。是讨人厌的夫妻,也是这个故事里的(或者他们自己故事里的)"英雄"。

当霉霉和Bon Iver的Exile伴随着Joe处理犯罪现场的画面响起时,觉得这首歌实在是太应景了。Bon Iver的这段,就像是Joe的视角

I think I've seen this film before

And I didn't like the ending

You're not my homeland anymore

So what am I defending now (其实这一句更像努力维持这段关系的Love)

霉霉唱的那段歌词,简直就像是在这段婚姻里挣扎的Love的心声一样。不管我多么努力做得多么好,就是不再吸引你了。你不爱我了。

I think I've seen this film before

And I didn't like the ending

I'm not your problem anymore

So who am I offending now

这一季实在太让人抑郁了。最后附上Love的那封信。Joe真的是大文豪。

Friends and neighbors,

I'd like to thank you for welcoming my family with open arms, but, you didn't. I move to the suburbs because I bought into the dream, community, prosperity, and most of all, safety. But I never felt safe here. Judged from day one, for my past, my body, how I was raising my child. If I wasn't perfect, I would lose it all. A game so rigged, it could only exist in a world that hates women, especially mothers.

But what choice did I have? So I played. And I realized your fence, your doorbell cam, you tell yourself you're keeping your family safe. But it's a lie. You are too afraid to do what you need to do to really protect your own. I'm on that hamster wheel too. So I forgot myself. But then your cruelty made me remember I am not a coward. I do what must be done to protect my family.

I killed the adulterer next door. I framed the anti-vaxxer who sickened my child, hunted down the reporter who threatened us. I trapped the couple who tried to sabotage us. Force them to really see each other. I forced my husband to play along. But in the end, he was a coward too. And when I realized he had grown to hate me, I killed him. Better than a messy divorce.

Everybody keeps their dignity. When the shock wears off, and you feel sage jogging in your expensive athleisure again. Remember you can get off the hamster wheel at any time.